After I’ve come back to Japan, my life has changed a lot. I flew back to the very traditional situation from the very American freedom. Maybe that is because I myself changed a lot during the year I studied at U of I. You can understand how my life has changed by hearing that I now live with my grandma, while I used to live with about 14 housemates in the big apartment called “Cosmopolitan Club.”
My choice to stay at Cosmopolitan Club was absolutely correct. It was the first time I lived by myself – I mean, without my family. Some of you feel strange that people like me who are over 20 years old do not leave home and live with their families, but it is a common thing especially for university students in Japan. (It doesn’t mean those people are over-indulged or too dependent.) I had lived with my parents before I came to Cosmo, so I found it fun to live freely at Cosmo, to cook meals by myself for myself. No one complained that I stayed up late or came back late. Also there were always friends in the house, and of course, those friends were almost at the same age as mine.
Living in Cosmo, one may realize some culture differences. It is normal because most of us came from different culture backgrounds. I remember that one day I cooked something—I forget what it was exactly—but something that was not Japanese food. One guy asked me why I always cooked only Japanese food. I said I was not cooking Japanese food but he wondered because I always used chopsticks when I cooked. He was right! I always use chopsticks for cooking even though I don’t cook Japanese food, since chopsticks are always useful utensils for me no matter what I cook!
This is a small example, but you may face those kinds of small surprises daily in Cosmo house. However, my point here is that, even though you are surprised due to these cultural differences, you may get used to them or you may not care about them at all. I think that’s because knowing another culture is one of the tools you have to make new friends in the world.
Overall, I enjoyed the series of cultural differences. And when I lived in the United States, I lived in a way that I would like to live. Then, back to Japan. My parents have moved to another city, so I happen to live with my grandmother who lives alone near our old house. If you see us, my grandma and I grew up in the same culture, which is Japanese culture. Although that is true, there are however a lot of differences between us! I assume that is the generation gap. And I can say it is harder to overcome the generation gap than the cultural gap.
She is a rather active and lively person, so I do enjoy living with her. But some of her conceptions are different from mine such as “not marrying in one’s 20s is a bad thing!”; “Coming back home after 10pm (or 9pm) is too late!”; “Writing emails instead of letters is bad manners” and other things like this. She is right at some points, but I sometimes feel hard because I don’t want anybody to interfere in my life as a student.
However, I personally like talking with the elderly, because I can learn a lot and they are so nice to me. (I am now remembering my American IHC host family–with them I had both a cultural and a generation gap, but they were so nice and kind to me, like my real family. I love them so much and I miss them a lot.) I believe it is fortunate for me to have a chance to live with my grandma right now just after coming back home.
My ultimate point is that once human beings get together, we may always experience some sort of differences, even in the same culture. And it is important for us to understand the gaps (cultural, generation) and learn from the differences. I am hoping that both of the experiences—living in Cosmo and living with my grandmother—are certainly nurturing me as one human being in the world.
Summer residents with Sumiko (sitting at the table, second from right)
at Liz’s birthday party in the back yard of the Cosmo house